After this incident, it was Sue who received most of the blame for her 17 years old actions as she was the mother and "she should have seen the warning signs. She should have been a better parent. She should have had better communication."
The Colombine community and the world had hundreds of "shoulds" for Sue and even Diane Sawyer(interviewer) had clear judgment on her face for the mother openly and honestly crying before her. The reality is that Sue didn't know a shooting would result from what seemed like your normal teenage behavior.
Being a religious woman Sue prayed and prayed for forgiveness over years and years contemplating her own suicide. Sue felt responsible for her the killings of her son and continued to dwell in the loss of these people and what she could have done.
When listening to her speak, this was a genuine person, a believer, a woman with good intention, faith, and love for her children. Her eyes were open, providing advice, discipline, asking questions, and providing her unconditional love. A secretive teenager living a separate life behind closed doors is not something a mother can always control or know. A teenager who presents with normal behavior, positive academic achievements and happy in his present self. Mental illness was not discussed in classrooms, hidden behind closed doors, and people dismissed strange behavior as a kid just going through the motions. How could this mother know?
While she endured extreme grief, sadness, pain, and scrutiny from others over the years, it was her present self that was the saddest part. She wrote a book, which served as a great cathartic release and education for mothers. Although, over all the time, the prayers, the solitude-she still didn't truly forgive herself. There were ounces of anger and disappointment and sadness that were present in her demeanor, her words, expression, and verbal language. It was a woman who couldn't let go, forgive, and move on and she was torn apart my grief-torn apart by a crime her son made the decision to commit with an extremely mentally troubled boy- Eric Harris.
This woman, Sue Klebold, deserves to authentically start over rather than still live in memories and pain. While healing may take a lifetime, there is a big step to forgiveness that can help lift her spirit to happiness rather than a dark cloud taking over her days.
Today, my thoughts are with this woman and I pray for her as she deserves to get her life back and find joy. She said her joy was taken away, but.....it can be found again.
Keep the faith and live life with a positive hope for a better tomorrow. PCR